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Republican Masters of Lame first see Darth Obama, Sith Apprentice

Posted by John Finnigan on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 1:35:56 PM

Republican Masters of Lame first see Darth Obama, Sith Apprentice.

When the Jedi Masters of Lame first saw Darth Obama, their mouths fell open and Master Useless asked, “ What is that?”

“ It looks like A Democrat Sith.” Said  Useless’ apprentice Johnny Boy McCain.

“But we haven’t seen a real Sith since Darth Bubba weaseled out of his sperm all over Monica’s dress.” Useless says.

Johnny Boy shruggs.

“Careful we must be,” says Useless “ The Sith always travel in pairs of two.”

“ You don’t suppose the Sith Lord could Be…” Johnny Boy is cut off by Useless.

“Jesse Jackson?” Injects Useless “ No, remove the testicles of this Darth Obama wants he. The ways of deception, incompetence and ineptitude are powerful weapons of the Sith. We must be very careful not to disgrace ourselves by being defeated by such Dark Lameness.”

“ Can we defeat the Sith’s weapons Master Useless?” Asks Johnny Boy.

“Difficult and treacherous it will be, my young apprentice.” Warns Master Useless.
 
" Dangerous and Difficult."
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Democrat Sith Lord to Obama

Posted by John Finnigan on Tuesday, July 15, 2008 10:38:46 AM

Democrat Sith Lord to Obama

A joke, for those incapable of recognizing one.

Democrat Sith Lord, Jeremiah Wright, summons his apprentice, Darth Obama to his chamber. Obama enters and kneels. “ What is your bidding my master.”

“You have grown strong in the dark side of the LAME, Darth Obama. But I feel a ripple in the LAME that betrays your feelings.” Obama is silent. “ Deception is key to success in our new empire,” continues Lord Wright, “ Even though we will crush the Honky, vanquish the Jedi and restore Darkness to the universe, we must be careful.”

Darth Obama asks, again. “ What the f**k do you want from me?”

Lord Wright smiles, “ Build me a pleasure palace in Tinley Park-away from the hood where the Dark Side of the Lame thrives. Buy me a Bentley, and give me a $10,000,000. retainer for incidentals. Send my wife on a cruise and lend me some your choice young interns.”

Obama responds. “ It shall be done, Master.”

“ When you have won the election We shall rule and restore the true power of the Dark Side-incompetence and ineptitude-to our kingdom and rule for a thousand years.” Says Lord Wright.

Darth Obama smiles. “ Can I have Larry Sinclair back then?”

Sith Lord Wright smiles, “ And the magic white powder too…”

Darth Obama leaves his Masters Lair wondering, “ Would Michelle can go on that cruise?”

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Republican Jedi Master to John McCain

Posted by John Finnigan on Monday, July 14, 2008 2:09:42 PM
 Republican Jedi Master to John McCain

A joke, for those not capable of recognizing one.

John McCain went to the great Republican Jedi Master “Useless,” and asked the following question: “Oh great and transient Useless,  teach me how to triangulate like yourself.”

Bob Dole, er, I mean Useless responded: “ Johnny Boy, the LAME is strong in you. In fact the LAME is so strong in you the media tacitly likes you. If you wish to achieve a LAME defeat like me listen to you inner LAMENESS and follow it’s course. However, if lightening strikes and you actually win, do not worry. You will be the longest serving Lame Duck in History.”

Visions of the Hanoi Hilton drifted through John’s brain and the LAME touched him powerfully.

“ I shall be a powerful Jedi Master of the LAME,” John told himself.

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Islamic Terrorism and the West

Posted by John Finnigan on Monday, July 14, 2008 12:41:56 PM

Summation of the clash between Islamic terrorism and the West on Egyptian T.V.

FYI

http://www.memritv.org/clip/en/0/0/0/0/0/0/1704.htm

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Gas, Oil and Sticker Shock.

Posted by John Finnigan on Monday, July 14, 2008 11:23:50 AM

Gas, Oil and Sticker Shock.

I was driving my econo-box car yesterday around the Chicago Land area. Chicago Land for those of you who don’t know is Chicago’s equivalent of Washington’s beltway. I paid a mere four dollars forty four cents and 99/100ths per gallon at the cheap gas store in lovely Orland Park.

Within the next two years I expect to pay twice that amount. I’m not happy about that.

However, truthfully, I love my cars. I always have and probably always will. I still love big SUVs and pickup trucks. I may hate paying $600 to $700 a month for gas for the big vehicles, but I still love them.

If I owned a really big pickup truck free and clear, I’d probably keep it and just pay the price for gas; and enjoy the privilege of driving it.

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